And sometimes that's all it's about.
Goal reached!!
Arrghhh
I woke up in a panic this morning. Great distress. Emergency call to the therapist for a sooner appointment. Reminded me how everyday, for years, I used to feel just like this. Pretty remarkable that I've gotten this far and fairly intact.
Turns out the nightmarish dreams that cause me to leap out of bed may just be more horrid memories of a childhood gone bad. Took me a bit to calm down and get things under control.
Pain is more sporadic and less intense. I'm more liberal with the medication and rest. I occupied myself, another prerequisite when it gets this bad, with mindless video games that focused my wandering mind.
Today's major task was simply to keep my shit together and scoot by with the minimalist of necessary functions.
Oh, you so wish you were me, don't you?
Sarcasm....Bazinga.
Yesterday, I wondered the yard taking photos. I'm tired of using images off google images. So, hoping all the photos I post on this blog will be mine. It's a little more insight into me and my life. I like what is mine instead of borrowing anyway.
I watched that Aspergers female video...Yikes! Way too much accuracy. I really didn't need any reminders of my limited functionality, thinking and social skills.
Just because it's true, doesn't mean it's pretty.
It's amazing I don't drown myself in a flushie, for how worthless I feel these days. My Partner made a sucky choice and the kids don't have the most astute or even functional, of moms. Everybody loses.
Currently flying without a wheel. No direction or specific focus. Just playing it close to the vest and getting through each day, and each night.
Maybe tomorrow will be better...maybe not...who knows.....I'm just sayin'
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