Calming down

I had my therapy appointment today. That really seemed to calm everything down. Seems the "nightmare" of the other night, was yet another unpleasant memory from early childhood.
 Once the memory was spoken, my physical pain and emotional distress dissipated. It's so weird how that works.
 The memory....was truly disturbing. Sometimes I hope that I am just making really crappy shit up. I know I'm not because my body physically feels what is being remembered. Shit. My dad was a real dick. Pedophile through and through.
The memory still seems pretty distant. But I go back in tomorrow to deal some more.
At least I do feel calmer. Things make more sense. It's pretty damn sad to think about what happened....so I try not to. Some information takes awhile to process.
Laying low for a bit. Heck, I've been laying low for about three weeks now....since this layer of memories has been surfacing. Sigh. I rest when I can. Some meds help at times. I'm grateful for that.
Seems this is all I do, these days.....remember, report and process. Doesn't sound like much of a life, but it's all I've got.


Not much else is new. I've talked with the disability office, a couple of times. My case is being worked on. I hope they "rule" in my favor and I get some money rolling in. I can't delude myself anymore. I cannot see a time when I will be able to support myself, hold down a job. Still tough to admit.
I see my limitations, the imaginary boundaries of places I cannot go. Reality is what it is.
So be it.
Hope you are keeping cool.